Greetings to you and your staff. I am 40 and my husband is 50. My husband does not like to bathe and brush his teeth. Sometimes he comes to bed without taking his bath and I have to get out of bed.

This man wants to have sex with me on his dirty skin. Before we got married, he used to visit me and he was fairly clean. Only once in a while I realised that he did not use deodorant and I bought him some along with cologne.

proper underpants

When we got married the first thing I did was to buy him proper underpants and I threw away what he had. He used to be with a woman and they were living together but not in a decent place. He started to come around me, so I took him in.

But as a Christian, we couldn't live together unless we got married, but now I am having a hard time with him. He does not like to bathe. I have gone into the bathroom with him and scrub him down, but I can't always do that because when he comes home I have already had my bath.

My children didn't want me to marry him but I went along and did so anyway, because I needed company. Sometimes I don't bother to sleep with him. I wonder if you can give me some advice.

I.J

Dear I.J,

Your husband is a dirty man but he is happy to have you. He is so dirty that he doesn't realise that he is dirty. He has got accustomed to it. He shouldn't even be using the same bathroom that you use. Can't you build an outside bathroom for him? And tell him that one condition to come into the house is that he should shower in the outside bathroom. Make sure that you put carbolic soap or blue soap for him to use.

Seriously now, talking will not help this man. Evidently, he has never practised good hygiene. So please continue to help him to do better. I know you are frustrated but unless he retaliates and curses you, treat him as a big baby who doesn't know better and needs help with everything.

If this man does not improve you might have to ask one of his relatives to speak to him about his hygiene.

Pastor