Dear Pastor,

I am not a good writer. I did not attend school much because I did not know my father. My mother had five of us and she was here and there, pulling us all over the place.

I grew up on the street but did not get into trouble. I was wiping down cars and hustling passengers to go on buses until one day I helped an old lady carry her luggage across the street, asked where she was living and she told me. I told her I would see her one day and she told me I could come home with her. I went home with her and she gave me the back room to stay.

I started to help her around the yard. She called one of her daughters and told her I was there. The daughter came over and told me I couldn't stay because she didn't know me. I begged her to allow me to stay. The old lady told her to try me, so she said alright. Every day she came by the house to see if everything was alright.

I went to evening school and learnt to read and write. This lady's daughter bought me clothes when she saw that I was not a bad boy. She also helped to get me a job. I went to church and changed my life. I even got baptised. I got my driver's licence and they helped me to buy a car.

A girl in the church and I became friends. She went on to college and I was working and helping her. I have a bank account in my name and the lady's daughter's name.

I went to the bank and withdrew some of the money. I gave it to this girl to buy books. She told me the relationship between us is over. I told her she would have to give me back all the money I spent on her. Pastor, I am serious.

We never had sex because she said she would not do that until she was married. I thought she was going to be my wife but she told me she never said that. The old lady I am living with told me to leave her alone and not get myself into trouble.

T.O

Dear T.O.,

You had a rough upbringing but, through your kindness, ended up having a home, a very comfortable place to live. You have made good use of the opportunity given to you. The old lady, as you describe her, got to love you and treated you as her very own.

It was quite natural for her daughters to be concerned about their mother taking you into her house. They didn't know you, but everything worked out fine.

I am glad you attend church and made a commitment to Christ. I am wondering whether you took this young lady for granted. Evidently, you loved her. The question is, did she love you? Perhaps she saw you as a simple guy from whom she could get some money. That is what she got from you, for sure.

I am going to suggest you try to forget this woman. She doesn't love you. It's going to be tough. You gave her your hard-earned money and your heart. Perhaps she led you on and dumped you, but that is a part of life. You will find another woman but not in a hurry. She does not have to return any of the money you gave her. It was not a loan. I beg you, don't harass her.

She said she never promised to marry you, but you don't need to be married soon. Stay at the old lady's house. Save some more money until you are able to buy your own home. Take care, my friend, be blessed.

Pastor